This past weekend i received an email from a local mortgage banker that contained the following message. It took me a minute to realize he was being sarcastic. I think he is beyond stressed out and frustrated. What do you think? Here's what he wrote.
2010 – 2020 NEW GUIDES LINES FOR MORTGAGES
· All Borrower's Birth Certificate will be required with Pictures taken in the hospital with medical staff. Birth certificate with a live home delivery will not be eligible for first time home buyers.
· Marriage certificate with bridal dress will be required if both husband and wife are required to qualify for the loan.
· GFE will not require signature but will require blood samples from a recognized institution within three days of application
· DNA tests will be performed at closing to avoid any "NON-ARM's" length transactions. Loan funding will be contingent upon satisfactory receipt of DNA results.
· Verification of deposit will be acceptable only if Bank representative is present at the closing.
· Copy of Pay stubs and W2 will only be acceptable through IRS only with a wax sealed envelope mailed directly to the lender with the Great Seal of the United States.
· 7 Witnesses from the neighborhood will be required as proof of primary residence in case Borrower owns more then 1 property and is claiming this as his primary residence.
· All appraisers will be required to use a mask and ear plugs at the time of inspection to avoid any potentially influence by the Borrower regarding the appraised value.
· In order to correctly calculate DTI and Debt to Income ratios a list of Grocery items, monthly usage and brand names will be required with receipts and projected 12 months consumption chart in excel.
· Closing will not occur without loan officer presence at settlement and Loan Officer's picture will be taken at the closing in a Mug shot format with loan number. Picture should meet standard Federal guidelines of 2 X 2 inch in color format with one facing and one side view.
· Loan officer's picture will be attached to the Deed and Note and will be made available for general public and security agencies in case Borrower defaults on the loan.
Back to Ann Cordes's blog, 'user_report.php?return_url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.perfectnetworker.com%2Fnetwork%2Fblog.php%3Fuser%3DAnnCordes%26blogentry_id%3D2579&TB_iframe=true&height=300&width=450', '', './images/trans.gif');){kind=spacer}
Inappropriate Content
